Many parents, Mike & I included don’t realize how important sleep is for their children. We all know it is important, but I think we figure “It’s just a baby, there is no way we can shape their sleep”. Well Parent’s, your wrong!!! It has been almost a week now, and I see quite a difference in our little Angel since we have picked up the Sleep Lady’s book. The Sleep Lady is Kim West a licensed clinical social worker who has worked with thousands of families . She does a great job of outlining how important sleep habits are for babies of every age. The book makes you feel like you are doing the first good thing for your child and yourself by creating good sleep patterns. It’s a good feeling as a new parent to know there is light at the end of the tunnel, and that the “attachment parenting style” does not work for everyone. A little crying is worth it in the end, but it does not have to be harsh. Before I go on and on about the great things this book has done for us in a week, I would like to acknowledge a few things that caused me difficulty. I had trouble understanding the appropriate time to start applying the principals of this book. I would like to save some parents from making the same mistakes I did.
First, the book does not touch on the “sleep shuffle” until 6 months of age. Do not get that confused. If you have a child who is under the age of 6 months continue reading the book after the 5 month mark but that does not mean you should start enacting the sleep shuffle. Next, we gave Mary Rose a pacifier to slow the tears the first time we did a new bedtime routine . In the back of my head I kept wondering if we were creating another sleep crutch for her. I was right, because whenever it fell out we would have to replace it. I would recommend from my experience not to start a pacifier at 5 months if she/he has never had one before. It’s cheating, and it’s not going to get you to the ultimate goal.
How last night went for us “ We put Mary Rose to bed at 7:07 pm and she did not wake up again until 12:30 am on the 6th night of our “sleep Shuffle”. Mom patted her back and gave her back her pacifier. It took 4 minutes and she was asleep once again. She woke back up at 1:30 and mom proceed to give her a nightly feeding which she usually gives at 2 am give or take a half hour. Mom laid the baby back into the crib after the feeding and Mary Rose went to bed without a peep. She did not wake up until 5:45 am. Dad tried to soothe the sleepy baby, but ended up picking her up and handing her to mom saying “it’s been 10 hours, she’s hungry” Now it is 6:39 am and I have the sleep lady’s book next to me, wondering if today is the day I’ll find the answer of how to teach a 5 ½ month old to sleep.
West’s book is a great outline full of many great suggestions backed up by her 15 years of experience. The 8 rules are important to understand, but somewhere down the line we got baby brain and completely lost our commonsense. I think baby brain for mother’s can be attributed to one or all of the following reasons’ “being a 24 hour nursing machine, 2 am feedings and 12 30 am pacifier popping, lack of sleep when baby naps because you are in awe of silence you forget it doesn’t last, and last but not least constantly helping daddy learn the new skills you just learned”.
So back to the issue of sleep. It will be a full week of trying Kim West’s sleep system and the progress has been slow, but probably due to my misunderstanding of the system . Since their has been some progress I look forward to continuing the techniques. The book has acted like a companion. Something I consult throughout the night when I can’t make it another tear. It is open and carefully dissected in between classes, in the car, and while reality TV is on. It holds all my hopes and dreams, literally, of a good night’s sleep. I would recommend giving this book to every pregnant mother at her first prenatal visit. That way she will be worried about the important stuff “sleep”, and less worried about what color to paint the walls in the nursery.
I miss her little nose wrinkle!!! Glad there is some progress on the sleeping! It will get easier soon!
Hi there! Its the Sleep Lady…I couldn’t help but to leave a quick comment! The Shuffle is designed for babies 6months and older….not that I haven’t had many parents modify it for younger babies. Since “Cupcake”? is 5months old I would recommend you read the 6-8month old chapter. The Shuffle is explained in detail in that chapter. A few other comments- any waking before 6am is a NIGHT waking so go and reassure her but don’t feed her or start the day (it will get earlier and earlier- I promise). Also you may have to decide about the pacifier…average age to learn to put it back in on their own is 8mons old. I have seen plenty of 6month olds learn how to do it but not younger (yet). In other words, you may have to decide to wean her from the pacifier which will mean putting her down at bedtime without it. Gulp.
Hope these little tips help! Stay consistent and sleep will be around the corner!!
Thanks for your kind words about my book! All the best, Kim
Deal Sleep Lady, I really appreciate you stopping by and leaving a few tips!! It really cleared up some questions that had me lost. I made appropriate changes to my blog, because I felt that in order to make my blog as honest as possible I needed to have the facts straight for myself. I look forward to the results of your system, and hopefully I can help a few new mommies who are hopeless find hope in your book as I have. Take care, and keep doing what you are doing, its fantastic.
Hi Liz and Mike,
Keep up the good work. Mary Rose will learn quickly. I have heard it takes only three days for a baby to make a new habit. Soon you’ll be resting peacefully every night!
Love,
Grandpa
Liz,
I loved reading your blog. I am definately going to get that book. So many parenting books contradict themselves and I find it hard to choose the “right” one. It is nice to know that it has helped you so much. Mary is a lucky little girl to have such a loving mommy.